Tuesday Funnies 2
January 15, 2002
|
Wet Clothes Cassie was a really good mom. When her children were growing up, her one son gave her more "stop and count to 10" periods. Once, after her small son fell into the pond and came home with his good school clothes dripping wet, the exasperated Cassie sent him to his room while she washed and dried his clothes. A little later, Cassie heard a commotion in the back yard. She called out "Are you out there wetting your pants again!?" There was dead silence for a moment. Then a deep, masculine voice answered meekly, "No, ma'am, I'm just reading the meter."
Wacky Definitions Gravity: Not just a good idea, it's the law! Gross ignorance: 144 times worse than normal ignorance. Clock: A small mechanical device to wake up people without children. Karaoke: A Japanese word meaning "tone deaf". Opera: Where a guy gets stabbed in the back and sings about it. Racial prejudice is a pigment of the imagination. "Normal": A setting on a washing machine. Health: The slowest possible rate of dying. Poverty: Having too much month left at the end of the money. Boy: A noise with dirt on it. Sleep: That fleeting moment just before the alarm goes off. Cynic: Someone who smells the flowers and looks for the casket. Witlag: The delay between delivery and comprehension of a joke. Skier: Someone who pays an arm and a leg to break them.
|
